Finding Win-Win Solutions
Even though the choices we make may seem insignificant and inconsequential to the big picture, every decision affects America in one of two ways. Either it helps to fortify and preserve America, or it works to undermine it.
A few real-life examples are featured as a means to demonstrate how the decisions we make determine whether we perform as a Patriot or a Pirate, and that a win-win alternative is always available to us if we know to look for it.
Situation #1
We are a first-time movie director making a movie with a target audience being the youth of America. After viewing a rough edit of the movie, the producers ask us to add a few more scenes featuring sex and violence so they can sell the movie to one of the premium cable networks.
We know that if we do not do what they ask, the movie will likely not be picked up and our career will be put on hold. We also know that if we add a few more scenes of gratuitous sex and violence, we will be contributing to the decay of society, causing children to become even more desensitized to personally destructive behavior.
We mention this to the producers who threaten to hire another director to finish the film. There are at least three options available to us. What should we do?
Available Options
Add the scenes of sex and violence. By making a successful movie this time, we will be able to make many socially empowering films in the future. After all, how much damage could one film cause society? Other movies being released every day are far worse than the movie we are making. Moreover, even if we object to the gratuitous sex and violence, someone else is just going to add those scenes anyway.
We stand on principle and walk away.
Neither answer is that of a Patriot.
Analysis
Response "1" is the response of a Pirate. Human beings cannot see as well as owls that can spot a rodent in a field from 100 feet in the dark. We cannot hold our breath for very long underwater as can seals, and we cannot track an animal over great distances as can dogs. What we do well as a species is rationalize and figure things out. Unfortunately, this amazing capablilty also gives us the ability to justify any thought and behavior that we might become inclined to entertain.
Our ability to justify is so keen that we can even find reasons why it is good to not win the lottery. (We won't know who our friends are... it's will make us lazy... it affects relationships with family and friends... over 1/3 of lottery winners go bankrupt... etc.)
We must not use our expanded mental capacity (ability to justify) to believe what is not true. Making a movie that hurts children cannot be justified. If we make the movie their way, we would be performing as a Pirate.
Response "2" (walking away) is not a reasonable option and therefore not the response of a Patriot. We have an obligation to our family as well as to ourselves to be successful. Becoming banished from the movie business because of a bad reputation will prevent us from fulfilling our ambition of making socially empowering films. We do not need to be a martyr to be a Patriot. On the contrary, we need to be in the fray and viable if we are to make a positive contribution to society.
Response "3" is our best response. We should do what is necessary to make a better film. There is an old saying, "you can't make a great film without a great script." A Patriot would insist on perfecting the script before shooting begins. The cost to bring in a team of strong writers to rescue an otherwise doomed project is far less than making a bad movie, or shooting additional scenes in a futile attempt to add excitement to a dull film. Instead, we would write a strong script, find a hit song and then make a great movie. This is the surest way to achieve success and increase our stock as a director.
Situation #2
We oppose the war in Iraq. We feel strongly about expressing our opinions. After all, we are smart and we might even have some military experience. We are approached by others to join them in public protest. We make a sign calling for the abrupt halt to hostilities in Iraq and the immediate removal of our troops.
We hear a debate on TV about the issue of protest. Is it patriotic to protest the war publicly and show displeasure toward our President? We know the enemy will see the protest as evidence that America is divided. We know our troops will likely encounter more resistance because of our actions, possibly causing some of them to become wounded or worse. Yet our right to assemble peaceably and speak out in opposition is protected by the First Amendment. What should we do?
Available Options
We pick up the sign and join our friends. We are being patriotic because we are fighting for our country the best way you know how. Even though we are not in harm's way like the men and women in uniform, we believe that we are doing our part. We are performing as Patriots.
We decide not to join the protest and instead watch a reality show on television.
Neither answer is that of a Patriot.
Analysis
Our large brain gives us the ability to do more than just find solutions to problems. It also enables us to justify any action we take. Yes, public protest is guaranteed to Americans by the First Amendment. However, sometimes not exercising our rights is best for America.
In a republic, representatives are elected to make decisions on our behalf. After all, they have the time, knowledge, and resources to discover the best options when faced with important and complex decisions. As such, we ought to work through our elected representatives and use the power of the vote to express any dissatisfaction.
Why embolden our enemies and endanger our troops when we can work within the system that made our nation great? Picking up a sign and protesting (option 1) may feel good, but it is the way to protest in a democracy — the form of government in which decisions are made by the prevailing citizen majority.
As we know from "Honor the System" (in "Strategy"), America is a republic, not a democracy. In a republic, picking up a sign is unpatriotic and the action of a Pirate.
Deciding not to protest and watch television (option 2) is not the response of a Patriot. If we feel strongly about something (such as opposing a particular foreign policy decision), we should actively participate but in accordance to the rules of a republic.
Situation #3
We have been married for several years. We have two children - ages nine and four. We have not been fulfilled in our relationship for some time. We have tried to make it work. We have gone through counseling, bought the books, and listened to the tapes, hoping for a miracle that would rekindle the good feelings we once had.
We have lost confidence in our future together. With no options left, we decide to seek a separation leading to divorce. We are concerned about the children but we hear it is better to be happy for their sake; that it would be worse for them if we remain married and live together unhappily. What do we do?
Available Options
We file the paperwork for divorce. Our happiness is important, too. After all, if we are not happy, how can we be good for our children? After the divorce, we will redouble our efforts to be good to and for them. We will make sure we each find good partners who will love our children as we do, and give them the support they deserve and need.
We find a way to make things work until our youngest child becomes 18. We believe we are obligated to finish the job of raising our children.
Analysis
There are ways to make our relationship work. It may not be personally fulfilling, but it can be cordial and productive. When we marry, we make a promise to America that, if we have children we will raise them in a safe and stable household until they become adults. It is the obligation of parents to raise their children to become moral, healthy, well adjusted, service providing, taxpaying members of society. Every child who becomes a liability is costly to society in many ways. Studies show that children of divorced couples have a much higher incidence of difficulty in life. As such, option (A) is the way of a Pirate.
Marriage is not about love, nor is it a commitment between two people (that is the purpose of the engagement). Marriage is a commitment between a couple and America. In this commitment, the couple promises to raise America's future citizens to become assets to society.
As such, we realize that marriage is a selfless act of love for our children and America, and we are committed to find a way to fulfill the promise we made. This means that, as Patriots, we will choose option (2) and find a way to work together until our youngest child becomes an adult.
In our workplace, we often work with people we do not especially like. Yet we are civil and productive.
Situation #4
We are a successful actor and vocalist. Because of our fame, we are sought by advertisers to represent their products to consumers. We have worked hard to achieve success and fame, and we want to be able to enjoy that success and live life our way.
Yet some people are asking us to modify our lifestyle. They claim that the youth in America is imitating our bad behavior, just as they do our hairstyle and the clothing lines we represent. Our initial response is to reject the notion that we are a role model. Yet we see the merit in their argument. We do have great influence over others. What do we do?
Available Options
We tell the critics to take a hike. We are not a role model and never asked to be one. Moreover, we do not feel comfortable giving advice to anyone, especially if that advice would obligate us to follow it.
We reflect and accept our newfound role as "role model for America." Although we are uncomfortable and will be inconvenienced because of it, we realize that we have a responsibility to endorse good behavior. Moreover, setting a good example will have a positive effect on America's youth — our nation's future adults.
Analysis
Like it or not, it is human nature for people to revere those who are famous (they represent dominance). Then again, if not for that very reason, celebrities would not be rich and adored by millions of fans; nor would companies pay them to represent their products and services.
As a famous actor and singer, what we say does influence others, especially those who admire us because of our success. Yes, we are not required to modify our behavior and empower our nation's youth. However, if we choose option "1" and refuse to accept a leadership role, we would be performing as a Pirate.
If we choose option "2," we can congratulate ourselves for performing as a Patriot. This is how we can best serve our country. Setting a good example can make at least a small (and possibly a big) difference to the future of America. Yes, we are not required to modify our lifestyle, but doing so will empower the youth of America. That is what makes us patriotic. We are selecting behavior that is good for us and America.
Naturally, we cannot force those who are famous (in a dominant position) to demonstrate empowering choices in an effort to set an example that will strengthen America. However, those that do the right thing should be lauded as "Patriots." In contrast, famous people (those in a dominant position) who are self-serving at the expense of America should be labeled "Pirates," and regarded as working against America.